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Why Do Situationships Hurt More?

A deep explainer to why situationship break-ups can hurt more than relationship breakups

situationship

Break-ups hurt, yes, but the agony of ending a situationship, which was never quite a defined relationship, can be even more excruciating. It’s a relentless cycle of wasted emotions that leaves one feeling hollow and desolate. When you’re in a relationship, you have everything figured out, but in situationships, clear context is conspicuously absent. You’re never officially dating or in love, you only get crumbs of the love and fragment glimpses of affection, and barely little of everything you could feel were you in a serious relationship. Situationships, by their very nature, lack the depth and commitment of genuine relationships, yet they have an uncanny ability to ensnare the emotions of even the most discerning individuals. Here’s why the anguish of a situationship breakup cuts far deeper than one might imagine. 

SITUATIONSHIPS ARE JUST DEEP FEELINGS, SHALLOW CONNECTION

It’s fun and cool at the beginning. What could you possibly ask for? It seems like the perfect arrangement – emotional satisfaction without the weight of commitment. However, as time ticks by, even the most emotionally guarded individuals find themselves unwittingly entangled in deeper sentiments, unintentionally ending up attached. The thing is, you never get those feelings as a result of a deep connection, your emotional side just clouded your judgment. You created a picture of them in your head that never really existed. So when you wake up one day and find they lost interest or made a shift in their attitude, you get slapped by the painful truth that you should have never taken it seriously. 

WHAT COULD’VE BEEN…

The relentless what-ifs continue to haunt us day and night. The lingering notion that we “could have been so good together” has the power to deeply ache your heart. What if I had been more transparent about my feelings? Would things have unfolded differently, or would the outcome have remained unchanged? You overthink every moment in your situationship and wonder; why it all went wrong. Countless scenarios flash through your mind where you too ended up happy and in love. In another world. You may even blame yourself for acting too casual sometimes, and that it was you who messed things up. However, the truth lies in the realization that it was never solely about you or them; perhaps, you were simply not destined to be together.

YOU NEVER SAW IT COMING

Yes, the shock is bad. You never saw it ending this early. You thought there was more to it. Being unprepared for bad events is really awful; processing the new reality where you’re officially alone can be harder than anyone might think. And here, you need to do yourself a favor, and never take anything for granted, especially this out-of-context kind of relationship. 

CAN’T SAY YOU’RE UPSET 

Technically, you don’t have the right to get upset, but it’s tearing you apart anyway. It’s frustrating that you can’t get mad at them for dumping you, for you knew and they knew it was anything but a serious relationship. But why does it hurt that much? Getting disappointed over things that shouldn’t do so with you can really drive you nuts. One thing you should do in such situations is to let it out, don’t act as if everything is okay when it’s not. Talk to your best friend, your closest sibling, your mom, to anyone who can understand how painful it is. Suppressing your feelings won’t get you anywhere better. 

People come and go. We plant our love roots so deeply in some of them that we lose a piece of ourselves when they leave. Relationships, regardless of their diverse contexts, shape our lives. Some people will give you butterflies, and some will give you headaches, or even both! Yes, breakups can really be heart-wrenching, but remember how things felt good at the beginning, how you saw life in flowers and roses. That’s the thing, nothing lasts forever. Here we remember the quote that we all weep to from Jojo Rabbit: Let everything happen to you, beauty and terror, no feeling is final. And now that we’ve mentioned movies, here’s a list of movies to watch when you just got out of a situationship! 

500 DAYS OF SUMMER 

SWEET NOVEMBER

FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS

SOMETHING BORROWED

LOVE AND OTHER DRUGS

ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND

 

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